(Inspired by super-missed, changed(?), BUT forever-loved bestfriends)
I HATE the new me. I do. If i can b*tch-slap myself a million times to change 'me', I'd do it (err...that would really really hurt) but I'd still hate myself, the new me, as I call it.
Why hate?
Why hate?
Because of a lot of things.
Because of the hurtful truths that this blog--->I miss revealed.
Because I can't define "me" anymore.
Because I am different.
Because I'm indifferent.
Because I didn't care that I cared.
Because a lot of things are out of my hands.
Because I want it all back again.
Because I lost track of things.
Because I'm afraid to do the next step.
Because I don't want to embrace the fact that life changes.
Because of the fact that everybody changes.
Because of the fact that I also changed.
Because of the things that I want.
Because of the things that I don't want.
Because I couldn't face my fears.
Because my fears have already happened.
Because I got old.
Because I have to be responsible for myself.
Because I have to be responsible, period.
Because I don't want to be with the people that I am with.
Because I want to be with people I want to be with.
Because I'm misundertood.
Because I misunderstood.
Because I don't make sense of life anymore.
Because I'm at a loss.
Because I want to forget.
Because I can't forget.
Because I feel happy but lonely most of the time.
Because I want all the worries to end.
Because I hate.
Because I love.
Because I cared.
Because I still care.
Because I'm lost.
Because I lost - a lot.
Because a part of me died.
Because I miss my bestfriends, very much.
Because I miss those wonderful moments.
Because I miss having real fun.
Because I miss my old life.
Because I miss - me.
4 comments:
sigh. breathe. be still. you'll find that all the answers are already within you. no need to look for them someplace else. you won't find the old you nor the new you. instead, one of these days, you'll realize the 'true' u.
in case you need anything, we're here for back up! just as you were there when i need one.:)
alain...the 'true' me scares me... hehehe...
yeng...i need a new me... and a spare me for backup, in case the new me cracks up! hehehe.... but seriously, thanks... :)
too much. too little. too soon. too late.
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