School Girl Crush.

It's official. At 25 years of age, my cheeks turn red, my hands all shakey and my knees wobbly - when my crush is standing right in front of me. Two, no, make that one step away from me. Close enough for me to smell him but far enough to restrain myself from hugging him!

Here's the clincher - he gave me his number!

I drifted home on a cloud.

*sigh*

Addie(ct) Notes 10

The day after we celebrated our first year here in Canada, Addie had his first class in my school. He teaches Creating A Narrative With Photographs every Monday, for three hours which would last for six weeks. 

Three hours straight, speaking in English. 

He's been dreading teaching since he had that meeting with my supervisor. Delaying his preparation, wishing that no one would sign up, and praying that the class won't push through. I wanted to sign up for the class but he said he would kill me first rather than have me there sitting in front.

On the first day, I stayed in school to show him some support. I waited for him after his class was over. When I went to his class, he was asking me if I have any tissue on me. I didn't.

I wouldn't make a joke about this, but I saw that his nose was bleeding. He said it started 30 minutes after he introduced himself to the class. And it continued even after we were eating. His nose was bleeding almost the entire time that he was teaching.

I guess the saying is true. Dudugo ata talaga ilong mo. Hahaha!

*one of his students asked him a question. 

to which he replied - "minsan, minsan" oops, I meant sometimes! hahaha.

Addie(ct) Notes 07

Me: Dad, pakiturn-off mo nga ung AirWick na spray

Addie: T*ngina kagabi ko pa hinahanap kung ano ung sumisinga na yun, yan palang air freshener na yan. Akala ko kung sino ung sumusutsot at sumisinga

Me: Eh kelan mo nalaman na yun pala yun?

Addie: Eh kaninang umaga lang, nung magisa ako.

One word: Shunga. shunga.

Addie(ct) Notes 06

I come from a Filipino family and we are fond of eating anything. I mean, anything from brains to unhatched chicks and other whatnots. Since we moved here, we have been deprived of those tasty treats. Everything around here is just clean and (ugh) healthy. They just throw out all the good stuff.

One day, while Addie and Mama were out, they stumbled upon a slaughter house. Hmm. Instinct pulled them to the spot and I'm sure they were thinking of all those yummy "pulutan" you can make out of a whole pig.

Addie: Do you have intestines?

Slaughterhouse Man: Yes.

Addie: Yes! Really? Where?

Slaughterhouse Man: Here. (points to his belly).

Addie drives away disappointed.

*why don't they just give us the darn intestines!

The (B*tch is) Back to School

I signed up for weekend classes at the school where I work. I know that it would mean not sleeping in on a Saturday morning. But the class was good. Although I am not sure if I want to do this in the future. I'm glad I took the course. I do hope I remember the things taught by Jess though.

BUT.

In every class, there would always be a b*itch. No it wasn't me. This was one was bigger b*tch than I am. I bumped into her before classes. She looked a little lost and here I am playing nice.

B*TCH: Do you know where Room 406 is?

b*itch: Oh. Are you going to take... (cuts me off!)

B: Can you just tell me where it is?

b: Uhh. It's upstairs (you idiot!)

B: Yeah, but which way?!

b: There. (pointing)

Argh. If I wasn't working there, I would have reached my limit and talked back. But seeing that I do work there, I had to behave. But I really could not let it go, so when I had a chance, I glanced at her and gave her the sharpest irap I could. I wasn't satisfied with just one, I did it again after a few minutes.

Fast forward to class introductions. When it was her turn, I didn't even look at her (which was not polite). But I still listened to what she had to say. Brag after brag, she went on. She took the stage. Rather, she stole it form the the instructor, from the class, from all of us. If I went to the washroom and went back, she'd still be talking. That's how self-absorbed she is. She wants us to think that she is the most "knowledgeable" person there.

Hahaha. I'm glad I didn't think of her as that. Because everything seemed to go wrong with her computer. She just simply couldn't follow and she's blaming it all on the Mac. Are you kidding me? By 2:00 pm she was gone. She just doesn't have the patience (or probably the knowledge) to continue. We were all glad and classes went smoothly til the next day.

The (small) b*tch won!

Addie (ct) 01

Albert. Berting. Dugong.

That's what my friends usually call my dad. But of course in person, they add call him Tito as a sign of respect. My family calls him Addie, an edearment that my cousin Danielle started a couple of years ago which, I guess grew on everybody. Those who know me very well, or even those that I don't would say that he is really my father. But he actually isn't. Joke. Of course he is. There is no denying it, I am the (though I hate to admit it) little berting of the family. There are a lot of things that I got from him - some I wish I hadn't, and some I wish I had. He is very good at what he does and someday, if I'm lucky enough, I hope to be as good as he is. (Yeah right!)

He is celebrating his 53rd birthday today. With the old age, we relate more to him now, than ever. He's had a share of moments here (even way back in the Philippines) which just cracks us up. He's a very funny man and here are his famous antics:

• He would describe/relate people to non-living things. One he described as "mukhang manibela", another "mukhang olive oil", and someone as "mukhang sakong". Now you know where my good traits and active imagination comes from.
• After talking to a prospective employer about his salary (which was below what he asked for) he said "may ganun?" and the guy replied, 'Im sorry what was that?", my dad said "Oh, I'm sorry, there's something wrong with the phone". Talk about palusot!
• After getting poor service from FORD, he calls them up, gives a big speech which included "Did I make an appointment? Yes. Did I pay my bills? Yes. Did I arrive on time? Yes. I don't understand why this happened. Is it because I'm Asian? Is it because I don't dress well?" (The litany took about 15 -20 minutes to finish. Good job for someone who doesn't use English as his first language. Then again, I found his notebook which contained 5 pages of the speech that he was READING on the phone!) Busted. Later he admitted that he didn't sleep very well becuase he was doing the speech in his head.

Oh Addie. I am so glad to have him as a father. I look up to him most of the time. He is the person that I try so hard not to disappoint and so far I think I'm on the right track.

'May ganun?"

Interests

• Creative Writing
• Music
• Thinking

*read on an actual RESUME

How do these people come up with this sh*t?

Sub Miss Eve

"Bonded: I have been bonded,

and am willing to be bonded again if necessary."

*read on an actual RESUME

SHUNGA-SHUNGA

*That is the term we (my Ate and Noy) call each other when we do or say something really stupid. It softens up the word TANGA and twists it up like a term of endearment.*

I'm complaining about my tired jaw. My Jaw. That's tired of speaking English every single day. Not just plain English, but English with a freakin' twang. I tried speaking without it. Speaking normally. But that doesn't fall into the normal category here. They won't understand you. You have to say things in a high-pitched voice. You have to put the right stresses and slang it up. In short, dapat maarte. But not like somebody I know. At least dito, its necessary.

I almost always want to b*tch slap myself every after conversation. It just doesn't sound like ME. But I kind of gotten used to it when I'm in school. But at home - just plain Tagalog. I've had my share of Pinoy moments and although I've always been ticked about bad grammar, I don't think my mistakes fall on that. It's a matter of missing words in my statements just like this:

Canadian 1: We will be closed during the holidays but I can get back with you on the 5th. Thanks so much, Mabel.
Mabel: Okay. Great. Thank you too. Have a holiday!

OMG. Kamusta naman diba? I really meant to say have a good holiday, but the word just didn't come out. I don't know why. And it was too late after I realized it. She hung up already. Shunga-shunga.

Since I consider myself an assuming person, yesterday - this happened:

Canadian 2: Thanks, Mabel. Bye!
Mabel: You too!

WTF? She did not say 'have a great day' right? So why assume she did and say you too! Two words: SHUNGA-SHUNGA. I'm trying my best not to add more to these two. But I get a good laugh whenever I think about it. :)

Kung Minamalas Ka Nga Naman Talaga O-Oh.

I never wanted to write about this. But seeing that the mishaps happened 3 times in less than 6 months, I guess it's worth blogging about. Even if it means revealing that I am a PG (patay-gutom), a short circuit starter, and a fire hazard. All in one. And all in one place.

The dreaded LIBATION CENTRE* also known as the pantry is where everything happened.

August 15, 2008. Yes, I still remember the date. I even marked it down in my calendar. The story has been played and executed in our household - even outside of it over and over again just to get on my nerves. It's not my fault that I had to carry my bag, my Gatorade, my keys, my food in just two hands. It's not my fault that I had just heated up my food and I couldn't hold it carefully. It's not my fault that I didn't get to lock it properly. It's not my fault that it fell on the carpeted floor while I was locking the room. It's not my fault that I rushed to the washroom to get some toilet paper to scrape it back to the container.

But. It's my fault that I still ate it afterwards. I've thought it over and over again. I could have gone across the street and eat at DQ. But I didn't. I keep thinking about my steaming HOT fried rice and SPAM. I wanted to eat it that day and nobody could stop me. Not even after realizing that the carpeted floor is trodded by hundreds of footprints everyday. But then, it was summer time - there were hardly any students. Ting! Silver lining!

I know, I know. After that incident, I learned my lesson. I now carefully pack everything that I've heated. And put it inside my bag - and then lock the room. Then eat clean food.

Again, sometime during the summer - I can't remember the date exactly. But I remember what I was having for lunch. Spaghetti and panini. Naturally, the first one goes into the microwave and the second one goes to the toaster. After turning them both on. Boom. In short - short circuit. I had to call my Supervisor to have it fixed. What an idiot.

And now for the most recent incident. I think I'm still all flushed from what happened that I needed a breather. I had to go out to get some fresh air - outside where it is surprisingly warm (-14c). After the heat I had encountered, it was just reasonable for me to go.

That bloody toaster. I curse it to the end. That non-living thing will be the death of me.

So at last, my lunch for the day was - giniling (which I heated before I used the toaster. see? I learned my lesson), a leftover blueberry bagel with cream cheese, and 4 pieces of white bread. Since it didn't fit in one setting, I had to put 2 pieces of bread first and topped it off with the bagel. I saw how close the bagel was to the top heat so I was watching it closely. Nobody wants a burnt bagel.

A few minutes passed and I was ready to take out my baked goods outside the toaster. Since I didn't have anything to hold it with, I used the paper wrap from the bagel to get it from the toaster. Less than a second later and the freakin paper is burning. As in burning. Fire**. Orange freaking sparks. I guess it touched the top heat portion so it went up in flames. I immediately let go of it. Let it settle down the carpet and stepped on it. When that didn't work. I jumped on it as hard as I can. And then it died. The Tim Horton's paper was half burnt after.

Thank God my doll shoes were not destroyed. Thank God the fire alarm didn't go off. Thank God. Oops. The Blueberry bagel. On. The. Carpeted floor. With Cream Cheese. This was like SPAM all over again.

You can guess what happened next.

*Wala pong hidden cameras dito.

**Ako pa naman ang FIRE MARSHALL sa floor na ito.

It's Been 6 Months...

since we left home.

And in those 6 months, a lot of things happened. I still can't quite grasp the fact that I'm living here now. And that things are different. But I need to suck it all up like a grown up!

I feel like there are only 2 major things that happened in 2008. First was Ate's wedding. Second was moving to Canada. Those two events were a turning point of my life - for our lives. As we added one more to our family, we were bound to be separated from them. From our relatives, from our friends, from everyone. Sad, but I Thank God for the internet! If not for it, I would have gone insane.

Our stay here, was as eventful as it gets. Here are some of our family adventures - a glimpse of our life, here in Canada.

Westland Moment

I've always considered myself funny. Not as hilarious as my other friends but I know how to crack jokes and execute them in the right time/way. But then going to this mall (probably the most boring mall on earth) just really rubbed its kajologsan on me.


Andrei and I were waiting for our ride at Westland Mall and a pretty girl walks by.


"Andrei nga pala" I say.


Ano yun ate? Andrei asks.


I explained to him the specifics of how that stunt works. A hot guy walks by and me and my friends sort of introduce ourselves without really doing so.


"Nde ko alam ate, na napakaforward mo pala" Andrei comments.


Sabe ko naman "Naku, sa sobrang forward ko nga, eh hinde mo na ako marerewind".


As soon as those words came out of my mouth, I regret it.


WTF?

Bus Incident # 2

While on my bus to Spruce Grove.

I sit by the lady who sleeps.

Very soundly.

As if she is having a good dream.

A jerk from where she is sitting startled me.

I forgave her for it. After all, she is sleeping.

But then, one after the other?

Are you sure you're sleeping?

Bus Incident #1

While riding the bus.

A Filipino guy sat beside me.

Kamusta?

Small talk. How long have you been here? Where do you work? Do you live with your family?

The guy answers "No, singol pako. Pero shtil ander nigosheble".

Ano kuya?

Translation: Single, pero under negotiable.

Thank God my stop is near. But the guy cornered me. I was sitting by the window.

Ano number mo? Para tawagan kita, bisitahin kita sa school mo.

Ah, ano... Uhm... 934-28...88! Bye!

*little did he know, I gave him the wrong one.

Lucky November?

I don’t consider myself a lucky person. I’m not the raffle draw-door prize winner-scratch card type of individual. That kind of luck just hasn’t followed me on the road. Although I usually get the same anxiety everyone feels when you think your name’s going to get picked but it ends there – it doesn’t continue on to euphoria. I got so used to not being picked that I could care less if they were giving away millions of dollars.

But this month, I was in for a surprise. During an open house photo exhibit there was a raffle draw before they ended the show. Of course, I look on and see more than 10 people have already been picked. Given my history, what are the odds of getting picked?

“Mabel Garcia!”

My first reaction was – WEH?! But then I had to compose myself and head towards the center to claim my prize. It was 2 tickets to a James Blunt concert. As soon as I read the name, I could not for the life of me remember who this guy was! But then somebody told me that he sang the song ‘You’re Beautiful’. Okay, so that was the only song I know and I had second thoughts about going. On the day itself, we decided that we won’t go. It’s way out in the city and we’d have to ask our cousins to wait for us. I guess it was just not worth it.

Still on the high of getting my name picked, I didn’t realize I was in for another surprise. Getting money from an automated machine was something I don’t like doing. The buttons are invisibly dirty and I just don’t like touching money (I let Scooby handle my financial needs). I usually do debit or interact as they call it here. But since the place we were eating at only accepted cash – I had to take out some money. I intended to get $60 from mom’s card. After seeing that the machine only dispensed two $20 bills – I was about to get furious when I decided to ‘feel-up’ the machine slot to see if it just got stuck. Err, that sounded kinda kinky. Well anyway, it turns out it got stuck but there were more than one. I ended up having $160 in total. That’s a hundred bucks more than I intended to get! Am I lucky or what?

Being the good Catholic Filipinos that we are – we decided to turn it to our bank. Well, mom decided. Hehehe. But the good news is, since we got the money off a privately owned machine – there was no way that they can track it. They won’t have our bank details and it was useless to contact them. As the Bank Officer said – ‘take it!’ well then I will. Minsan na lang mangyre to no!

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas...

This time of year in Alberta, temperature should be about -25c and everything is expected be covered in snow. But NO, I guess Mother Earth is being soft on us - on every Filipino new to this land. Coz the temperature is still tolerable but still much colder than what we are used to. There has been previews of snow but not really full blown so nobody has declared that it's officially Winter.

And since going out is still an option and we are up for some holiday cheer, we headed over to Churchill Square where the tallest Christmas tree in North America will be lit up. Towering 80ft, this tree used to be 100ft or so but they had to cut down some of it for transportation.

Everyone was there, (even Santa) kids and kids at heart - all covered up for the cold temperature. We were kind of under dressed. By the time the show was over - I could not feel my toes and I thought my ears would pop off!

We were kind of disappointed. They could have done better in decorating the tree or choosing the right kind of lights to adorn it. But they chose dull colors so when the finally lit the thing up, my AWW! became AYYY! Yun na yun? A lot of oomph was missing! They should have asked me to decorate it! Oh well, at least we got to see fireworks that accompanied holiday songs which made Tita Jo and Mom burst out in tears. That kind of got me going too, a sort of melancholy feeling. Sigh. All in all, it was fun. We ended the night with McDonald's and Marble slab (their version of Cold Rock). And here I thought we were all cold. Everyone still had their fill of ice cream. Pcitures below are taken by Addie. :)

At Churchill Square. Tents behind housed products from all over the world.

Some mascot.

Edmonton Mayor and Santa. Turning on the tree.

Charan! Diba mejo dull? Maliwanag pa ung lights sa paligid.

Mom. Me. Tita Jo. Danielle. Ginormous tree.